Pop Punk Propaganda!

Pop Punk Propaganda, that is what Vikings manager Eaglesrjh had to say after the nonsense that came from their press department today.

It's true that Branston was out with a few Vikings team mates having a quiet meal with some of the lads to celebrate a good away win. However like the rest of the very well disciplined Vikings players he was only drinking mineral water in order to be fresh for training the next day.

What happened next is that a bunch of rowdy out of control AFC Pop Punk players came careering in, clearly the worse for drink. They were celebrating a goalless draw and no longer being in the relegation zone, these being the heights that these players celebrate!

They then made poor new signing Olli Rahkamaa undergo a weird initiation test which is too vile for words but involved vile and depraved acts that we hope never to see again. During this initiation Rahkamaa bumped into Branston as the Vikings midfielder was going to put all his loose change in the tin of an old woman who was collecting for charity. Branston and his team mates had been appalled about the abuse the charity collector had had near the pop punk players.

Branston being a kindly lad immediately offered to shake Rahkamaa by the hand to show there was no hard feelings, however Rahkamaa in his drunken state went to kiss the midfielder. Branston managed to avoid the lip contact but doing so accidently spilt the pint of Adolf Crippler. Branston was going to get Crippler another pint but the defender took a wild swing at poor unexpecting Lewis.

Branston was off balance and tripped over a chair leg causing a slight tear in muscle in the ankle. He was quickly whisked away from the scene by his Vikings colleagues who left a big tip for the waiting staff.

We caught up with a Vikings official who had the following to say.
It is true that Lewis Branston has acquired an injury in an out of grounds incident. He will be missing from the team squad for about 18 days. As for the story coming out of George at Asda Pop Punk Park we can confirm this is nonsense of the highest order. The players there are clearly totally out of control as shown by their initiation rites, the club hierarchy seem to be no better, no one had been in touch with the Vikings before the "quote" from our "spokesman" so this is total nonsense. Branston has no history of injury and certainly no history of being forceful towards other men, as his beautiful actress girlfriend will testify. We are considering our position and lawyers may well be called in soon as we seek damages for our players injury and recompense for the slanderous nature of these comments.
We then asked the club official if they had spoken to Pop Punk manager Solongsuperman about the incident.
Not yet. We tried to contact Solongsuperman at the club, however when we finally got an answer all we heard was a series of weird noises and crying, it's not clear if this was Paddy after a bottle of meths or if somehow the newest arrival at the club little Ella Joan McKeever had got hold of the phone. We certainly won’t be commenting on the rumour that due to cash flow issues that Ella has already been installed as club secretary. We have also heard that she is taking the training sessions and setting tactics and has already relegated her father to boot cleaner!

At the moment there is nothing more to say on the matter, it's all clearly been fabricated by Pop punk to try to take the gloss of us being top of the league and divert attention away from their predicament at the wrong end of the table!