"Look, I understand that Ith likes to see himself as some kind of literary mastermind as well as some kind of fashion guru" blurted out the clearly fuming Pink Bus gaffer.
"I have just read his latest PR, well I tried, but I couldn't get through the pretentious use of language and superfluous word-useage"
"I wouldn't mind if Ithaqua actually had the first clue what he was talking about. He uses these fancy and posh words like he is some kind of upper-class Squire. However, the truth is a much more deressing tale"
"When Ithaqua received his random (random my fat arse) VIP membership from Eagles, it came with a "How to teach yourself to talk posh...whilst coming across as a nobhead...and a gay" cassette. Since then, Ithaqua has been listening to this cassette on his walkman and has been teaching himself some new fancy words." the manager claimed.
"So, people, Ithaqua is not actually as educated as he likes to make out. In actual fact, he is a simple minded oaf who cannot tie his own shoe-laces without having to trawl google looking for diagrams to help"
"He harps on about his Saville Row suit in his latest PR. Who is he trying to kid? I saw him steal that suit from a skip behind the Bernado's charity shop"
"In short, Ithaqua is not a posh, well dressed man about town. He is, in fact, a simple-minded village-idiot who dresses like a vagrant"
"Do not be taken in by this imposter, he cannot be trusted"
The gaffer then opened up the message from Barfin's Mrs in his inbox, his jaw dropped to the floor at the photo he received. "Christ, she is a saucy one" he whispered.
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